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The Wild Grape
And now a word from our sponsor...
I've only got a few minutes before I have to send out some more tendrils, so let me get to the point. How many times have I heard, "Oooo,
that grapevine is destroying the trees?" And, then, there are all of you guys who get me and that nasty poison ivy vine mixed up, and the next thing I know you're chopping me down with machetes and spraying me
with poison! Considering everything I've done for you and your parents and their parents – all the way back (and I mean ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE BEGINNING), you'd think that I'd get just a little bit of
consideration.
Where would you be on Friday night without my grapes for wine?
Go ahead, drink a cup of fig wine and see what it does to your stomach. I've been making wine for your holidays for thousands of years – long before your ancestors came to the United States.
And, did you ever try stuffed grape leaves? No? Oh, my!
If you're under the age of 18, call the 1-800-CHILD ABUSE number right now to report this. In just a few more months, I'll set out some tender new leaves for you to use. No charge!
There's a fellow named Gabe up in New Jersey somewhere who knows a good plant when he sees one.
Campers at Cedar Lake Camp worked with him all of last summer to make a grapevine basket large enough to carry a person. It's a work of art, if I do say so myself.
I might also mention that I am one of the seven most special plants of Israel – one of the Seven Species. And this isn't an honor given lightly.
So, the next time someone says, "Oooh, ugly grapevine," you just set them straight.
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